For Sale: Instant boyfriend/girlfriend

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Courtship is one of the most exciting, romantic and special time for women. This is the time where couples get the chance to look for a potential partner. It is the time where a man has to work hard to get his girl fall for him and the time where the girl feels secure knowing that the guy went to great lengths to win her heart.

In Philippine custom and tradition, courtship is more subdued, discrete and indirect compared to Western Cultures. This practice which dated back to the Spanish time strictly abides to conservative norms set by the society for pursuing a woman. Traditionally, a man cannot just approach a lady and ask for her name or address. If a man sees a woman she likes, he should seek the help of a mediator or “tulay” in Tagalog, to ask the permission of the girl’s father if he can visit her in their house. “Harana” or serenade, sending love letters and “paninilbihan” or servitude are just some of the traditions being practiced by traditional Filipinos.

Today, although a lot of traditional courting practices are still being observed, there are modifications and “evolutions” that have been made that give the traditional Filipino courtship a modern version.

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Now, the modernized courtship in the Philippines revolves on the liberalism of Filipinos. With the influence of Western culture through the intervention of modern technologies, modern courtship these days is going fast. Our very own “Harana” turned into a song dedication on radio, love letters evolved into text messages, and “pamamanhikan” later becomes a family dinner in restaurants—-making the traditional year-long courtship turned into weeks, days or even a couple of hours.

With the advent of new technologies, little by little the Philippine courtship becomes cheaper and cheaper— literally. In just a few hours of conversing through sending text messages and e-mails, one can easily find a partner. With just a peso, (barely a peso since there’s text promos now a days) the courtship is being done.

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No wonder relationships these days don’t stay long compared before. This is because in the first place, the foundation of the relationship is not strong. Now, you can just easily approach a lady walking on the street and ask for her phone number. A few talking and flirting on the phone will give you an instant boyfriend/girlfriend. You could even see couples having their first dates holding hands and PDAs (Public Display of Affection). —things that are completely forbidden in the context of traditional courtship.

In courtship, hard work and patience are important in order to achieve a long lasting relationship. If the guy had waited long enough and had gone through different tests just to win the woman’s heart, it will teach him to value the woman and not to give up on her easily. And for the lady, enough time will give her chance to think deeply and decide whether the man is really the one meant for her. This way, there will be less complications since it will allow both parties to know each other better.